May 18, 2025

To Hell and Back: Katherine's Update 2025

Katherine 2025:
Back from the edge of hell.
You're gonna have to go through hell. Worse than any nightmare that you've ever dreamed. But in the end, you know you'll be the one standing. You know what you've gotta do. Do it. Do it!

-Apollo Creed

In 2014 I wrote my last book. In 2015 I wrote my last article. And shortly thereafter, I stopped posting on Facebook. And though I did try to indicate why at the time, it's been more than a decade and those reasons and posts have long been forgotten. 

Instead, what remains is my silence. And that has lead people to the conclusion that I am dead. 

But I am not dead.
I am very much alive.

That will make some of you happy. And that will make others quite disappointed. I understand both positions. My first book was called Telling the Truth, after all. And, according to the texts of heaven, the world is divided upon that very boundary: truth vs. lies.

If you read the Old Testatment's prophets, Jesus and His twelve Chosen apostles, you will find a very consistent message: we will be judged by the way we live. It is not who or what we believe in, but the choices each of us makes along the lines of love, lies and truth.

Did we choose to 'live and love lies'?
Or did we choose love and truth

Wherever we live in the world, we are taught to choose between one of two narratives on nearly every subject. But each of those narratives was developed at a think tank, designed to make industries vast amounts of money while concealing the truth from all. For - the truth will set you free.

Don't think that's so?

I'm living proof that it does. Literally.

The truth lies in between these two sides they sell us on each topic - it lies in between the narratives. Each narrative has a bit of truth and a bit of deception. To seek truth is to find the answer in the middle. And that's what I did while fighting for my life. It worked out - despite a few close calls.

Katherine 2025: Back from the Dead

I did nearly die. Three times. I have a very, very rare illness that kills when patients are not diagnosed in time, especially children. I survived because of my husband, Nick, a large team of very talented and very skilled doctors, nurses and technicians, and because of the Lord and His angels.

I'd like to take some of the credit. It sure as hell wasn't easy, fighting to stay alive in those dark moments. I was stuck, essentially, in a hospital bed for nearly a decade. My body was paralyzed from my jaw down for years, and my muscles faded, my skin turned pale and I was curled into the fetal position for most of the day. My husband had to be my nurse, caretaker and provider. I had to develop hand signals to communicate because my vocal chords didn't work.

Oh, I could go on and on about the terrors I have faced these last 10 years. But I have tried sharing these with friends, and I have given them nightmares instead. And I love you. So, just... trust me, okay? I stopped writing books because I could no longer write them, not because I didn't have ideas.

For years I settled for jotting book ideas down on napkins when my hands could work so that I could write "when I healed." But then the doctors began to tell me I may never heal. They prepared my husband and I for what many of them considered 'the inevitable': my passing.

Well, they didn't know Nick and Katherine. We would scoff on the car ride home, forgetting that I was on a mattress in the back of our car because I could no longer sit up. The nurses said I needed an ambulance for all of my doctors visits, but our insurance just laughed.

Anyhow, as you can imagine, my closest brush with death was during COVID. I found myself in the ER, saying my goodbye's to my husband Nick. 

But the Lord had other plans.

The Truth

The truth is, I lost my memories, my legs, my hands, my words, my ability to plan or think ahead and in the end - when I was at my worst - I didn't know what day it was, what time it was, what month it was or even the year.

I could not remember my birthdate when the doctors asked for it. 

Things people take for granted - driving, using a phone, ordering online, going outside, wearing clothes, going to the bathroom when the need strikes - became impossible for me. 

What filled the void? Pain. Excruciating pain.

And pain, like nothing else, alienates a person. My doctors work on war veterans and star athletes whose bodies have been pummeled into pulp. To us, an injection or a blood draw goes unnoticed. We don't flinch because we don't feel it.

When my body would relax, the tremors would come, and I would have episodes. And the episodes alienated us more than anything - even the pain.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you look at it, the part of my brain that remained the most intact was the part that learns. If I selected areas of study without any memory triggers, I could read and study away. So that's what I did.

I learned about everything I'd known nothing about.

That's how I escaped the pain. Games were out. Their bright colors and flashing lights hurt and caused episodes. But studies and law briefs were very plain: black and white pages that went on for hours. And, thankfully, most filmmakers were opting for gloomy filters with very little color variation. I could watch documentaries and 3-D animations from university departments without much difficulty.

But I found myself pulled towards real-life video footage as well - from the few citizen journalists and vloggers without sponsorship deals. Once I lost the ability to leave the house, I found myself thirsting for videos that showed me what I was missing out on.

Do you know? Not many people simply post the leaves blowing in the wind or the colors changing as the seasons do. We take all that for granted. But I didn't see the Sun for six months straight one time. When we received a diagnosis and I finally went outside, I was absolutely stunned by the seasons. They seemed miraculous to me. Anything that wasn't dry paint on a wall or a bed with medical equipment everywhere - it seemed miraculous to me.

I can't tell you how exhilarating it was to put my very first dish into the dishwasher, to call for my bank cards to be reinstated (no one stops using them for 10 years and then suddenly returns to use them again), or to dress myself without help.

And now?

And now I have a diagnosis. I know what day it is. I know what year it is. I can do chores, order online and fill up the car's gas tank. Oh, it isn't easy, and I'm not always functional, but I'm not close to death's door anymore.

And best of all, I can write a paper with citations on just about any topic you can throw at me. Most people don't have the time to hunt down primary sources - or more importantly, the truth that lies between the narratives. But I've had nothing but time. So that's all I know now: truth.

Recovery is hard. It requires a ton of physical therapy, occupational therapy, patience and pain. But I've come this far. The hardest part is over. 

A new chapter begins.

As does a new Katherine.

All my love and best. Always.

-K

March 15, 2025

August 23, 2017

Freestyle Footwork 6 Video Goes Pop with SIA

The story behind Freestyle Footwork #6
Video after the jump!
As you know from my last post, I have to wait until my health says "yes" to a taping of these Freestyle Footwork videos.

It was a long 14 days after my last video, Layla, that I was able to film again. It was so bad, I thought it had been a month. So when my body whispered "maybe?" I was chomping at the bit.

So I devised a plan: find a song that would yank my body past the pain and into my excitement and desire.

Solution? Cheap Thrills by the amazing artist Sia (who sounds like Rihanna, don't you think? What a voice! Where has Sia been all this time? Australia should've coughed her up sooner, dang it!)

Now, Sia's favorite song of mine has been, and probably always will be,

August 16, 2017

Where Did I Go? Plus Another Full Song Drops: LAYLA

New video is here! After the jump!
It's already here! Another full song footwork video has dropped, and this time, it's to one of my favorite WCS songs of all time: Eric Clapton's acoustic version of Layla.

For you folks who have been around a while, you'll remember that when this song dropped on MTV's Unplugged, it went viral, and we danced to it like crazy. I never stopped loving it, and still used it my arsenal up until my illness in 2011.

That's when I had to quit doing Walk Like an Egyptian and created Secret instead. But I was fighting fate. And so I wrote instead.

Some of you have asked why I've been gone for so long, and the short answer is the one, if you've been reading my Notes from the beginning, is... exactly what I've said: my health. But here's what I didn't say:

August 14, 2017

WCS Freestyle Footwork 4 - First FULL Song Release in 5 Years!

Why I'm Dancing Again - And It's Good
(Video after the jump!)

When I created the Freestyle Footwork concept more than a year ago, I had no idea how poor my health was at the time - or how much worse it was about it get.

Shortly after taping those three short videos, I learned just how bad my knee really was - a full root tear of the right meniscus. Snapped right off in the middle of a Salsa dance.

So I stopped dancing and started rehabbing. In fact, my time spent rehabbing, up until three months ago, lead me to believe I was done dancing... FOR GOOD. So I said goodbye to that part of my life, and was grateful for the time I had been given. It was hard and it took a long time, but I did it.

Then-- suddenly, new doctors, new treatments and most of all - new medicines. I rarely get to dance now... but... I. GET. TO. DANCE!!!

So, in honor of that, I've pledged to film as much of it as I can for you, so that you can learn from a real Champion, with real technique, doing real WCS, just like

#104: Welcome to WCS!

New Series Just for You:
Welcome to West Coast Swing!
From the end...
Spring new beginnings. 
-Pliny the Elder
___

From Weekly Note #104: Welcome to WCS! (Click to view original Note.)

Last summer I mentioned a new series of videos I was working on. I'd finished taping them but they never quite made it online. The timing just didn't work.

But that's all in the past! I'm happy to announce that Part One of this four part series is up online on my GetSwingIN YouTube Channel. If you are already subscribed, then you've probably seen the announcement already!

But if you're not subscribed, let me fill you in...

December 14, 2015

Stole the Show: Jordan and Tatiana's Last Routine

What you missed in Stole the Show
Jordan Frisbee and Tatiana Mollmann's
"Final Bow" at the 2015 US Open
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.
-Thomas Jefferson

Before you read the article I wrote today, I want to clear away some cobwebs first so that you can see it clearly.

Look. Talking about Jordan and Tatiana is a very difficult thing to do.

It's like talking about gun control. People lose their minds and talk nonsense no matter what side of the matter they fall on.

But here I am, trying to voice my feelings and an opinion about - basically - Tom Cruise to a crowd that either defected from or most decidedly belongs to Scientology.

But I caught things in the routine you most likely missed. 

I did grow up with them. They were my childhood friends, so to speak. And though what they've done to the dance of swing may crush me and though watching a routine that's only 15% swing again sickens me, like a punch to the stomach again... I loved it. I loved it for what it was. And that's what I talk about in my article today.

That may be a hard thing to understand or hear from me depending on where you stand today. So today I'm asking you to take a step back and just... hear me. Listen to me. Hear me out. Thank you.

THE LAST ROUTINE?

Jordan and Tatiana performed a new routine at the US Open this year. When I watched the video of it on Friday, just on the fly, I stopped it halfway through and said out loud, "Wait. What?" and called my husband.

I played the song and asked if I was crazy. "No," he said, "I'm hearing the same thing."

So I hit rewind and watched the routine from the start. I watched the whole thing. And then I saw it all. And there was a lot to see.

Basically they did a song that very much seemed like a huge goodbye to the dance community. Then, after performing that routine, they gave a sort of retirement speech at the awards ceremony. I wasn't involved in any of it. I was just an observer, but...

...in the end, I thought they did right by themselves.

Let's take a look at this Last Routine of theirs, shall we?

Their Song

Jordan and Tatiana used Kygo's Stole the Show, a beautiful song that's perfect for Abstract and seemingly written for Jordan and Tatiana's themselves... in fact, if I didn't know better, I'd think Kygo had personally written the song just for them and this situation. It certainly sounded like it.

The song speaks of a brilliant debut, large performances, playing to full houses, stages full of roses and then... the roses start to wilt. The thrill is gone. The show- it can't go on. It's time for our curtain call. Let's take our final bow.

But.... "at least we stole the show."

Didn't they ever! Isn't that exactly what they did? Well, they didn't just steal the show, they broke records, changed the dance, changed the sport, changed the game, created a whole different universe and wiped out another one. For better or for worse, they stole the freakin' show. That's exactly what they did. Amen.

But now they're ready to move on. That's good. Healthy. Long overdue, but still. They deserve an exit. We all do. But what I love the most is how they used this routine to do it.

What I Loved

It was an hommage. A perfect, beautiful and well done hommage to who they were and all that they had done.
In this light, I loved it. 

It was the hommage part of it that inspired me to write this article, not the fact that they are heading out the door. So let me point out my favorites.

First, Jordan and Tatiana were much more relaxed in this performance than I've ever seen them. And I can understand why. When you choreograph a routine to win or stay on top, that's one thing, but this was different.

It was a love letter instead. 
And love letters are easier to write and perform.

As a result, I felt like I saw more of them this time - the parts of them I loved growing up, and I saw more of the joy that comes with maturity and adulthood. There was strength and peace in that. I loved seeing 'reality' come out of them, instead of domination. They simply enjoyed themselves more this time around - they seemed to savor the performance and savor each other a lot more. Time felt like it was on rewind. We haven't seen those two in a long time.

Second, I loved their nods to the past. It's as though they wrote them in for those of us who were there for all of them. Here are some of my very favorites:


"Our debut was a masterpiece"

US Open/Partnership Debut:
Juniors 2001
#1. My number one favorite moment was at 1:27, when the song lyrics say "our debut was a masterpiece." Then Jordan and Tatiana illustrated that expertly by performing one of the "masterpieces" from their actual US Open "debut" by dancing their signature move from their Juniors Division routine. (They first entered Classic in 2001, when they finally met the age requirements, but their real debut was actually in the year 2000 when the hotel moved us over the room this second picture was taken in.)

That move has a lot of history for those of us who were there. Brilliant reminder. Brilliant hommage. Perfect for them.

#2. The next time the lyrics say "our debut was a masterpiece," they do the ever famous hip hitches in parallel second positions towards the audience at an angle - another move uniquely their own that debuted in their Strictly Swings long before it debuted in their More routine in 2011.

The parallel jackson featured in this routine was a throwback.
a classic move of theirs from Strictly Swings and demos
#3. Their beginning pose and shoulder movements in this routine referenced their famous Viva la Vida routine and its beginning "puppet on a string" shoulder movements that were meme'd so often. I did not love Viva la Vida, but I did love this reference simply because 1. it let everyone know at the very start that things were different this time and 2. they did it beautifully in sync and with greater control than I've seen from them for a first performance in a while. It was striking, poignant and relevant... for them. I loved it.

There were other things I loved, from the level of difficulty, to their return to a quiet start - rising to a spinning climax format - from their acknowledgement of their fans to their excellent acknowledgement of each other - it was a beautiful hommage beautifully done.

Their Own Dance

I'll be honest though. I also felt this was a fitting hommage for them because they didn't try to do West Coast Swing. I only saw 15%, which is pretty much where they were at before I started writing and you demanded more.

Instead, they did the dance they themselves created. They didn't do Club WCS or Pure WCS - they did their own version of Abstract Improvisation which they created themselves. Not only that - but they did it Oh so well!!! Oh, that was a really good thing to see - their grown up control, precision and grace. I was grateful for that.

So even though it wasn't swing - it was their own dance they developed to stay on top, killing swing in the process - still... I sincerely tip my hat to them for dancing it. There's an honesty in it that I appreciated, especially in a goodbye letter.

I have said for a long time that the dance Tatiana and Jordan do in their routines is one that only they themselves can do... and them alone. You can't learn their dance - you'd have to be remade with the same length of muscles as Tat has in her legs, to the same height as Jordan to the same centimeters in her heel... Get it?

This dance is them, and them alone.

Skippy scrapped her entire WCS syllabus and started over after Jordan and Tatiana came around. We never learned footwork that collides with one another - we were never taught that men go down the slot all the time and women get out of the way before... We went from syllabi that made sense and helped us grow into Champion dancers if we worked hard enough... into gyrating clones gyrating sadly and bumping, crashing, landing lumps on the floor. It's insanity.

But it makes sense when you realize that they were just trying to figure out how to duplicate Jordan & Tat's unique connection--- everyone is still trying to be them - but that's something only they can do.

Gone are the days of a syllabus that works. In are the days of cloning sub-par versions of the real thing. As such, it's terrifying to think of what the cult will become without its two idols to worship... because once they are gone, then BAM! All the ugliness will be unveiled.

Jordan and Tatiana made Abstract look good. They are the club which the bullies that make up the cult use to bash everyone and anyone they can get their hands on that thinks clearly or freely.

But who will be their club now? They hate anything old. They crave everything new. Who can possibly replace them? Because even J&T will admit their champion WCS training provided the basis for the dance they created. They needed the skill of control and tight connections first. And who has that nowadays?

But don't worry. The cult will survive. Scientology will survive the loss of Tom Cruise, if that ever comes to pass, and so will the cult in WCS, after losing Jordan and Tatiana.

What's Next?

At the awards ceremony Jordan and Tatiana took to the microphone to say that yes, they are retiring from the Classic Division, but that no, they are not going anywhere. They said that they'd been attending the US Open for 20 years, and that they plan on spending the weekend with this "family" of theirs for the rest of their lives.

Well. Here's what I think.

I think I've been in this community a long, long time. I think I know the way things are done and the way they play out. And so far, I haven't been wrong.

So I have no qualms about saying this:

I think they did say goodbye with this routine, and I think they did it well. I think they really aren't coming back - retirement speech or not. I think they'll be with us for a while... but they are slowly working their way out... starting now. 

I think we won't see another routine from them, and soon we won't see them at all.

That's a hard pill to swallow, especially for the "abstract/ convention" crowd, but I also want to point out that I have an eerily perfect track record on predictions about swing. They simply come to fruition. Freaky, but true.

So it may be sad, but it still is true: they are leaving us.

But I thought they gave us the perfect farewell gift: a routine that painted a portrait of who they were for future dancers, mirrored moments that we've loved from the beginning, gave moments of new inspiration for their followers and said that they loved us as much as we loved them.

I can see them ending in no better way.

This article is an excerpt from Weekly Note #111; JORDAN AND TATIANA'S LAST ROUTINE

2025 update: It was, in fact, their last competitive routine on the West Coast Swing classic circuit.


November 02, 2015

Parris Goebel: Brilliant Choreographer Sets World on Fire

Parris & her crew in the record-breaking "Sorry" video
Over the weekend, Billboard 200 announced that history was written last week. Adele's new Hello video broke YouTube viewing records, nearly doubling the number of views Taylor Swift snatched when she broke YouTube viewing records earlier this year with her ridiculously amazing Bad Blood video.

And as much as I love Adele, the video I was replaying all week, both online and in my head, was not her Hello video, but the other video Billboard wrote about in their announcement: Justin Beiber's Sorry video.

That's right. I said Justin Bieber. I'm kind of mad about that. I can't stand the guy. Ever since he wrote those awful things in the Anne Frank Museum guestbook, I've crossed him off as worse than a Nissy. Something much worse. But he's not in the video. Nope.

So how did it break records anyway?

October 26, 2015

A Tear Like No Other: Dancer's Knee Surgery Journey P4

MRI of the Knee
I've been shot!

And though it finally happened, though they finally stuck a massive needle into my right knee for an injection, it was not their idea this time: it was mine. And after the last journal entry, you might think you know exactly what an injection meant for me... but you'd be wrong.

Everything has changed. Again.

It turns out that all seven medical professionals who viewed my knee MRI, from the radiologist who took the images to the top rated orthopedic surgeon I wrote about last week... it turns out that they all read my MRI incorrectly. 

Big time.

October 19, 2015

Shock and Repair: This Dancer's Knee Surgery Journey 3

I am still in shock. This journey to knee surgery has not been a roller coaster. It has been a cyclone. 

I'm barely holding my bearings right now, standing right between two huge and important appointments, and am snatching both my breath and the moment to write a brazen update so you don't get lost without me.

Here's what's happened since Part 2:

  • I had an MRI taken on the right knee, which is damaged the most of the two.
  • I met with my primary doctor who had ordered the MRI, who then, upon reviewing the results, referred me to an orthopedic surgeon.
  • I met with my "top 10 in the field" orthoscopic surgeon.

And then my world fell apart.

September 28, 2015

Freestyle Footwork 3: Lil' Mama - Sausage

A New Footwork Video is Here:
The Story Behind It
If you were like the rest of the nation - scratch that - world, you were rockin' out to Lil' Mama's summer breakout hit "Sausage." Not only was it incredibly tight, catchy and well done, but the music video she released it with blew the last few years of MTV video awards out of the water.

She was, in short, hot this summer. And I was so, so glad to have her back.

Unlike most artists that top the charts these days, she doesn't rely on explicit lyrics to send a message. Not only that, but her message is always a positive one. It builds community rather than breaks it down. Bullying has become so rampant we become hostile when someone doesn't do it in their music, and Lil' Mama took some of that heat this summer.

September 21, 2015

New Video Series! Freestyle Footwork

Introducing a new series of
free footwork videos.
Lately I've begun recording a new series of videos for you to check out on my YouTube Channel (GetSwingIN). Now that I am able to dance again, albeit in a very limited capacity, I've been looking for ways to share it with you once more.

The new series, called Freestyle Footwork, is very much what the title implies. I pick a song I feel like dancing to, hit record on the camera and then I try to forget about it. I love the motto "dance like no one's watching." And that's the motto I keep in my head while I boogie on down.

I never dance to a song twice. I never choreograph beforehand. I just let my feet carry me where they will. Just like I used to.

September 14, 2015

This Dancer's Knee Journey, P2

My Knee Surgery Blog, Part 2
Tomorrow I head into the MRI for my right knee. I'm so ready.

I've had a lot of time to reflect since hearing the news that yes, it's time to operate on my knees. More importantly, I've had a lot of time to take notice of that one single knee that's being imaged tomorrow. 

That's new for me. My attention, for almost five years now, has been on some mysterious disease that's attacking every system in my body. As a result, I'm used to looking at my body as a whole, attaching everything wrong with the disease.

But now that the spotlight has been shifted to my right knee, my attention to it as an individual problem has unearthed startling results.

September 08, 2015

Video of the Week: Boogie by the Bay Podcast, P2

Part 2 of my Boogie by the Bay
Insider Podcast is here!
Boogie by the Bay is right around the corner, so it's time to check out the last half of my BBB Audio Expose Podcast

Confession time. Though I spill a lot of info in this podcast series, its not reflective of my other work. This is a much more personal podcast, because I personally worked with this team and it didn't end well. At all. 

If I recorded it today, it would sound very different. I know about the cult now. And in that light, all of the drama I experienced goes right out the window. All of these crazy stories you will hear will suddenly make sense. They don't sound so crazy anymore. They sound like textbook cult behavior.

August 31, 2015

This Dancer's Knee Surgery Story, P1: Going In

Knowing Our Knees in WCS
As my doctor was examining both of my knees, I thought back to when I first entered the world of WCS. I'll never forget the ladies at the US Open and at a few Tom Mattox events in Southern California who showed me their knees proudly: "See? I only have these three little round scars. That's it!" 

They were, of course, showing off the new kind of knee surgery available: Orthoscopic surgery. Instead of massive scars down the middle of the leg, which ruined the reason we wore skirts back then, knees were being taken care of with just three little knicks that could easily be covered up with a bit of concealer. Oh, how excited and proud they all were!

Of course, back then I was just a teenager. I knew nothing about knee surgeries. I didn't know about the huge scar down the middle of one's leg. I didn't know what a torn meniscus was, or the importance of healthy cartilage in my knees or how to protect them. I just saw three little holes, heard about a microscopic tube and thought - That's cool! 

Three little holes didn't scare me. It didn't make me understand what I was really seeing:

August 26, 2015

Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Dancing and Beyond

"Passive-agressive people are also known as 'the underminers.' They will smile to your face, but then stab you in the back. They will tell you they stood up for you, but they really helped sink you. They will give you a compliment, then follow it up with a negative notation. ("Nice skirt! On sale?") You try to help them get better, change, or understand what they've done, but do not bother. Passive-aggresives 'would rather be right than successful.'"
___

I took down these notes and more at a medical seminar recently. I found it interesting that even the medical profession recognizes that this pattern of behavior is so prevalent in society that the general public needs to be trained, not just psychiatrists or sociologists. What about you? Who is passive-aggressive in your life? I find that women are much more passive-aggressive then men. We can be our worst enemies, whether on the dance floor or in the work place. Think of a woman you know in dancing who has been nice to your face, but cuts you off on the dance floor? Critiques your clothing choices, partner choices - any choices at all - right after complimenting you?

June 26, 2015

#109b: What is a Cult? The Five Things They All Have

Cults: Get in Line or Get Out
From Weekly Note #109-B: What is a Cult?

What exactly is a cult? I hear that question all the time. There are 5 signs that I'll break down for you in a moment, but the bottom line is - cults are hella scary! 

They are pits of quicksand that operate waaaay more like black holes; they don't just suck you in and suffocate you, filling your lungs, ears, mouth and tears with tiny granules of glass - they pull you inside out too, scattering every molecule of you across space and time... and your family too.

Cults aren't cancer. They are much more deadly than that.

Those who are powerless - or oblivious - make the best prey, so this article is specifically designed to empower you - empower you with the skills to see, smell and feel a cult coming before it envelopes you or one of your loved ones. Here we go: